Mischief

Been doing push-ups lately. God I love push-ups. Push-ups should be their own religion. People should get together in large gothic cathedrals and praise God through liturgical push-ups. Make them get their communion on the down up. It'd be the fittest religion ever.

"Do you love God!? Hungh? do ya? Prove it, give me twenty!!"

I'd be the best priest ever. Of course there'd be a fundamentalist branch as well that did those push-ups where you come up and clap your hands, or like, one handed push-ups. My regular push-up church would be branded main stream and would gradually dwindle away as people got older and that new upstart push-up church over in the strip mall that used to be k-mart would have like, thousands of people all doing push-ups at the exact same time and in tempo. My church would promote a diverse push-up where you could do your push ups wide or in the middle. We'd even allow that wuse push up where you're on your knees. That other church, those fundamentalist bastards would be all: "Jesus said do it this way!" when in actuality it was probably Paul who probably only implied something, but they say "The word of the lord" anyways. God that's messed up.

Then there'll be those really wacky types who do push-ups for Jesus but like they have snakes involved and everyone wears too much gold jewelry. There's a connection there people.

For sunday school we'll do sit-ups. Something a little more casual of course.